Contentment- n : happiness with one's situation in life …a state of mind in which one's desires are confined to his lot whatever it may be (1 Tim. 6:6; 2 Cor. 9:8).
Patience – n: the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like…an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay…quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence.

    I have always been told that the two above words go hand-in-hand, that without one, you cannot truly have the other. I have recently found this to be undeniably true. I am not the most patient person in the world, especially when it comes to certain areas in my life. I hesitate to state the areas I am most impatient with, but maybe by the time this is through, it will be apparent those which are hardest for me.
    I come from a lare family, I have 11 cousins on my mothers side, the majority of them females. Well, if you have female cousins or sisters close to your age, you know how growing up in this environment can affect you. It is a very competitive and oftentimes judgemental relationship, but (hopefully) it is a loving one as well. As females we are raised with all sorts of influences telling us to be prettier, smarter, amd skinnier than you actually are. We are told that if we are not this perfect being, then our lives will be good, yes, but they will not be as good as everyone elses. This was a them in my family while I was growing up.I heard it from 5 aunts and numerous cousins. It was like a competition at family get-togethers for the mothers to compare their daughters.
    Now don't get me wrong, I love my cousins and my aunts, but until I was older, they had a way of making me feel like I was not very successful. I had one cousin who was an amazing softball player, one who was a model of sorts and had boys falling all over her, one who was an accomplished beautician, etc.and me, well I was the good little girl who went to private school, sword fought with her brother, and had never had a boyfriend. I could sing, but unless that made me famous, well I was not much of anything. I know they didnt mean (at least I hope not) but I would always leave my grandmother's feeling a little smaller than I had when I arrived.
    It wasnt until I a junior in high school that I began to realize that I was not so ordinary or small. I went to a Girls of Grace conference and heard Angela Thomas speak. She highlighted this verse: The KING is enthralled with your beauty." (Ps. 45:11). I love this verse, but it is so hard to grasp and to actually believe. Like I said, I am not a very patient person and i had never been particularly beautiful, per se. So, as much as I wanted to believe this, I didnt. So, like any impatient person who is not content with God and His plan, I jumped at the first chance I had for a boyfriend, thinking it would make me happy. Not a good thing, I lost my best friend when that "relationship" ended. Well, you would think I would learn not to hurry into things.. nope. Unfortunately, it was a mistake I made 3 more times...and each of those times, I have lost friendships that meant more to me than anything. I'm not trying to get to a moral of "dont date your best (guy)friend", but more of a "Wait."
    Just wait. Dont try to let the world tell you who you are or when these things are supposed to happen. Patience, as hard as that sucker is to have, really is about the best thing in the world... next to God and chocolate of course. Seriously, though, God thought patience was pretty big too. In 1 Timothy 1:16, Paul tells us "I recieved mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life" and in Hebrews 6:12 it says "So that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises." GOd doesnt want us to just be patient so we dont get hurt or so we can find something better, but so that we can  understand Him and his infinite ways.I dont think it can get much clearer than that.
    Just a bit for you to chew on.
    Peace out homefries
-Sydney Brooke

ps I dont claim to know anything.. you can disagree if you want

**people who I 'mention' in here, dont be insulted, it really isnt about you

So, its been like, 6 months since I wrote anything. Sorry about that.  Its been a busy time.

This summer was somthing else, let me tell you what. Workin for my mom and going all lkinds of places lke PCB, Savannah and Washington state. Fun times all arounf until AUgust rolled around.
In August I lost my best friend for no apparent reason after almost a whole summer of hanging out and fun times. She just quit talking tome. She finally talked to me about a week ago but things wont ever be the same which is very sad for me because we have been bffs since 7th grade and she is like a sister to me. I pray that we will be able to work things out more, but I dont know if it will happen.
Then after Boomsday, which is the nations largest Labor Day fireworks show (right here in K-town, TN) I met Jay. Well to make a long story short, we've been dating since then. Barely a month, but I'm happier than I've been in a long time. He makes me laugh... a lot. Now dont get me wrong, he wasnt a random stranger I met on the streets, funny as it sounds, we were friends before via the good ole internet and myspace since last February. I had liked him and never  met him, strictly on personality and beliefs and lo and behold..  he's a cutie. lol.

I really dont know what to say... um.. thats about it. School is not hard this semester which worries me, but its all good.
later taters
-Sydney Brooke


p.s. this is me and the boy